When I think of the word "foam" I think of something soft, padded - squishy even. I realize that everyone who owns a foam roller is now laughing at my naivete. (And that's probably all y'all as I seem to the be the last person on the planet to obtain one of these suckers.) Yes, I had heard people laughingly call foam rollers "torture devices". Yes, I had heard the word "hurt" in conjunction with foam rollers. Still I thought people meant "hurt" in that stretchy-wow-my-muscles-needed-this kind of way. I had NO IDEA they meant "hurt" in the holy-fuck-someone-is-stabbing-my-thigh-with-razor-blades kind of way. I actually hissed in pain (and scared the dogs) the first time I managed to roll correctly. (I will not detail how many attempts it took me to figure out the rolling action. I've mentioned I'm not the most graceful land creature known to man, right?) Before I started I thought, "I'll do the foam roller for 10 minutes and then hop on the bike trainer for 45." Ha! I have now learned something new about my blogger pal Kevin, who foam rollers himself for thirty minutes at a time! Dude - they have some interesting night clubs for people like you!!!! I had to do that crazy delivery room breathing (ho ho ha ha) to last thirty seconds. (Again, scaring the dogs. Wasabi ran to the door barking like a fiend. Tallulah licked my face and tried to take a bite out of the roller.) Donna looked at it and remarked that it worked on the same principle as the meat tenderizing mallet. Nice. Well, in case anyone wants to know: my right thigh is now completely tender(ized.)
Tuesday, June 3, 2008
Are You People Crazy?
When I think of the word "foam" I think of something soft, padded - squishy even. I realize that everyone who owns a foam roller is now laughing at my naivete. (And that's probably all y'all as I seem to the be the last person on the planet to obtain one of these suckers.) Yes, I had heard people laughingly call foam rollers "torture devices". Yes, I had heard the word "hurt" in conjunction with foam rollers. Still I thought people meant "hurt" in that stretchy-wow-my-muscles-needed-this kind of way. I had NO IDEA they meant "hurt" in the holy-fuck-someone-is-stabbing-my-thigh-with-razor-blades kind of way. I actually hissed in pain (and scared the dogs) the first time I managed to roll correctly. (I will not detail how many attempts it took me to figure out the rolling action. I've mentioned I'm not the most graceful land creature known to man, right?) Before I started I thought, "I'll do the foam roller for 10 minutes and then hop on the bike trainer for 45." Ha! I have now learned something new about my blogger pal Kevin, who foam rollers himself for thirty minutes at a time! Dude - they have some interesting night clubs for people like you!!!! I had to do that crazy delivery room breathing (ho ho ha ha) to last thirty seconds. (Again, scaring the dogs. Wasabi ran to the door barking like a fiend. Tallulah licked my face and tried to take a bite out of the roller.) Donna looked at it and remarked that it worked on the same principle as the meat tenderizing mallet. Nice. Well, in case anyone wants to know: my right thigh is now completely tender(ized.)
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12 comments:
LOL!! Oh, it hurts so good..
I do not have one. Have SEEN them in the store but don't have one.
Um, OW.
I don't have one and thought of getting one last year when I got hurt. I guess it is a good type of hurt ;)
I don't have one, but will probably end up getting one soon. Thank you for letting me in on what's to come. LOL
How does your leg feel now?
Kevin is not human :-) If you have ITB or thigh issues, the foam roller is your friend! He cares enough to hurt you like you need to be hurt!! LOL!!!!
OMG LMAO. Thanks for letting my secrets out.It hurts, but you will feel better later. I need to get on mine before i go to bed. There are some great how to videos on youtube. I even found a new torture pose to try to work on tight glutes.
http://www.youtube.com/profile_videos?user=BodySpex
I guess I don't get it. I don't have any pains that would be relieved by that thing.
I feel kinda like the kids that doesn't know the secret handshake to a club. LOL.
Fortunately, I've never needed one but I've had a sports massage that provoked similar feelings. It got easier to handle after a while but the beauty was that it worked. And I've heard the same of those who use foam rollers for ITBS. Do what you have to in order to keep running!
Oh yah, first time I used one of those puppies I shouted out loud. I need to get one for my house, I've only ever used it at the gym.
OMG...this post just cracked me up...especially the part about night clubs for people like Kevin! You are too funny.
I hope I never need one of those torture devices.
Yikes, people talk of this foam roller action - I plan to have none of it. N.o.n.e.
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